peace . love . joy

on impulse, i decided to get my family a lil smthg for, oh, no reason whatsoever.


we are like this. God made us beautiful. but we do things that displeases God and we also dont do things that pleases Him. the beauty and perfection of what He created in the beginning was marred.

but then, God loved us so much that He wanted to give us, all of us, not just the jews, a second chance. He wanted us to see how much He loved us, how much He wanted us reconciled with Him once more, that He sent His one and only Son, Jesus, to take all our uglyness, all the things we did, do & will do that displeases Him upon Himself. Jesus took the weight of all that with Him as He died on the cross for us.


through God's gift of Jesus, we are able to go back to Him, slate wiped clean, all decked out in our Sunday best, beautiful, sweet-smelling and perfect.

that's why we love Him.

*this is the ,,final product'' of my gift to them. lil tags with their name on one side and a short verse from the bible that i think will speak to them.*

gOd bLesS

me

i will sing
of the mercy of the Lord
and i will shout
of Your faithfulness o God

for there is none like You
seated in Your majesty
Holy One i come
to worship You forevermore

You are my God my life my all
and i live for You alone
i am Yours evermore
heaven and earth will shout Your praise
the wonder of Your name
i'll proclaim evermore

evermore

evermore

and i will run
into Your presence
and i will sing
sing forever




God is God.

i still find that so awesome.

sometimes, we take God to be our friend. that's not wrong.
sometimes, we take God to be our comforter. that's not wrong.
sometimes, we take God to be our Father. that's not wrong.
sometimes, we take God to be our confidant. that's not wrong.
sometimes, we take God to be our Savior. that's not wrong.

But, sometimes, we forget that God is God.

only God's will matters. only God's opinion matters.

He can think it and we'll be dead as doormice. He can reach down and bowl us over as easy as flicking an ant. He can crush us like toothpicks.

but he doesnt.

He chose to think about us - our well-being, our everyday lives, our souls. He chose to reach down and hold our hands, envelope us in His protective arms, pick us up when we fall down. He chose to grow us like plants, nurture us to bear fruit.

He could kill us and it still wont matter because He is God and He can rebuild it all, but He didnt. He chose not to.

that's my version of Fearing the Lord. to know He can smite us but chose not to.
when Eric asked us that once, this thought was running thru my mind, but as usual, i chose to shut-up.

(i tell you, one day my decision to shut up will cost me dearly, but i hope that day is still far off, whatever far off means.)

still pretty much in awe that God (God, okay?!) actually wants to have a relationship with us (us! the pitiful bunch of silly critters!).

seriously standing in awe (literally mouth open standing stupefied, mystified)

One
God is really good to me. blessed me with friends, even when i stubbornly tell myself that i am alone. sooner or later, the fact catches up with me - i have friends. and for that i'm really thankful.

God is really gracious & merciful to me. for all my complaints and whinings and ungratefulness, he didnt give me what i deserved - a swat in the butt and a cold turned shoulder, and he gave me what i didnt deserve - acquaintences i never expected to see again and talk to in my classes that i initially thought i was all alone in. my lectures were all all right, my tutorials thus far were all right. and i had loads of fun today in (my favourite) Jonathan London's lect (hope he's my tutor). he changed into his red sox shirt and cap and adidas singlet for the sake of explaining a concept to us =]

All creation cries to You
Worship in Spirit and in truth
Glory to the Faithful One
Jesus Christ, Gods son

All creation gives You praise
You alone are truly great
You alone are God who reigns
For eternity

God is great and His praise
Fills the earth, fills the heavens
And Your name will be praised
Through all the world

God is great, sing His praise
All the earth, all the heavens
Cause were living for the gloryOf Your name
Glory of Your name

All to You, oh God, we bring
Jesus teach us how to live
Let your fire burn in us
That all may hear
And all may see

Holy is the Lord
The whole earth sings
The whole earth sings

~ "God is Great", Marty Sampson

Two
SHIVALI'S BACK~!!

i missed you so so so so so much, shivs!

was on the ever addictive youtube again and i came across this video and thought it's so sweet! so, just for you, sweetheart =]

i've simply GOT to blog abt this day~!

*takes deep breath* okay. this day is a really special day.

one. it started with church. the sermon by PastorMohYing was really good. it spoke volumes. shall post it when i've the time, cos i think u guys will benefit frm it too =]

two. had lunch with 4 really lovely girls - carty (my sister), justina, jolena and joanna. even though the majority of the pple going for lunch together were at the food court at holland v., we decided to eat at crystal jade. the food was great! steaming hand made noodles with beef goes perfectly with the drizzly cool weather. had a great time talking abt nonsense =D

three. this is the day when we started our first training with the sec 3s. AND this is the day when i finally started running!! i cant believe how much i missed running =x i actually enjoyed it! running in the slight drizzle, barefoot, sloshing thru puddles on the court - heavenly. plus the laughter, occasional comments of the kids and encouragement by the leaders, it was beautiful.

four. i'm really encouraged by hitomi. even though, in my opinion, it's difficult to actually have sports training for the sec 3s with the sole purpose not being to simply improve their skills, she went ahead and told the kids the objectives - bonding between betwn the peeps involved, allowing them to seek out pple (leaders & peers) they can turn to in times of difficulty, platform for bringing non-christians and to share the gospel. i really admire her for her efforts. i know it aint easy. aint easy bringing a bunch of pple tgd for smthg which isnt terribly important in their eyes, i know cos i've tried. aint easy controlling them. but i think she and gabriel did a great job and i applaud them for that =]

five. i feel happy. mebe it's cos of the sermon today. mebe it's cos of the exercise. mebe it's cos of spending time with pple i dont normally spend time with and having smthg fruitful being born at the end of it all. whatever it is, i'm glad i sacrificed studying time for training (i havent even finished reading one subj - sociology of economy). but i'm happy.

and i know God is happy.

that's all that matters.

gOd bLesS

me

God is God and i am not. God is great and i am tiny. God is all-powerful and i am an ant.

This forced humility runs contrary to our self-promoting tendencies. Because of our ancestry in the Garden of Eden, we were born with the desire to gain the position that belongs to God and God alone. We want to take ourselves higher and bring God down lower.

In Genesis 3, Adam & Eve listened to the lie that they could be like God because they craved what belongs to God alone. In Genesis 11, man again sets out on a foolish plan to make a name for himself by building a tower "with its top in the heavens." In Romans 1 we learn of the propensity of every human heart to exchange God's truth for a lie and to worship the creature rather than the Creator.

Yes, in all of us is a self-centered bent to get me up and get God down.

Getting a proper view of God reverses that sinful inclination. When i see God as being above me, beyond me, highly exalted, over me, and totally separate from me, i am putting myself in a very good place - under His awesome Hand.

When i embrace God for who He is, then i properly understand who i am. When i know God's place, i can know my place.

That's what seeing God as He realy is - Holy, Sovereign, Separate - does for us. It puts everything and everyone in its rightful place.

God is so great, i am so small. And that's the way it's supposed to be. There's infinite relief in knowing where i really fit and who is completely in charge. It's God "who looks on the earth and it trembles, who touches the mountains and they smoke!" (Psalm 104:32). As the psalmist rightly assessed, "Oh come, let us worship and bow down; let us kneel before the Lord, our Maker!" (Psalm 95:6)

~ excerp from "Our rightful place" by James Macdonald
(https://www.walkintheword.com/images/spread.pdf)

i just realised that my blogger template doesnt support chinese characters *hai*. and i only realised that after i typed a whole entry in chinese, clicked "publish post", checked the blog, and saw a mess of weird characters (not one chinese character in sight at all).

i dont hate chinese (never really hated it per se), just couldnt bring myself to really want to put in the extra effort to ace it. then, talking to my ex-chinese tution teacher one day made me realise how horrifically terrifically atrocious my chinese was (had to pause for a whole second before i could reply a simple one liner). i decided to try to revive my "mother tongue" (the one the Singapore Government refers to: Chinese pple to Chinese). to tell the truth, my chinese standard is currently smwhat like my dialect speaking ability - horrendous. why arent there classes we can take to improve our dialects and learn more abt other dialects? i love my dialect! why cant there be classes i can take to improve on it? i cant even read my dialect! i can only speak it! *sheesh*

anyway, i'm gonna rant here, so those looking out for smthg edifying \ of a certain quality (?) it's not too late to stop reading.

just finished the first week of lectures (tutorials start nxt week). i have one thing to say. okay, mebe more than one thing.

1. i HATE the teeny-tiny lecture rooms. (the one on level 4 in the North Spine). so...claustraphobic!
2. i DONT like school food. no, not even the macs there.
3. i MISS doing readings. gonna start once again soon *yays*
4. i'm so GLAD steph, puiki, dae, sijia and i are meeting on wednesdays for lunch.
5. i LOVE dialects.

yep.

oh, i did James study 3 (1:19-27). went online and found other sources for bible study on that particular portion. they were really interesting! i must say, (sorry Hannah & Yipeng), i found some of them more interesting, easier to understand and more engaging than the book we're using. but, i'm thankful we even have a book to begin from. i've never really done so much"research" on a book in the bible before. never really went all out to find out meanings and possible questions and cross references and main themes in a book in the bible before today! and i'm here to report, sir, that i luvvit!

there's so much to learn from James! James is one of the shortest books in the bible (5 chapters only) and already thee's so much to garner frm its pages, what more with the other books?! oooohhh, this is SO exciting!

my daddy's leaving for Brunei tmr morn. not sure how i feel abt that. i mean, i'm happy his career's still alive and well, i'm happy he's going away frm Singapore (i love travelling and i'm naturally glad for anyone going overseas: the thgs they'll see, the smells they'll encounter, the pple they meet...), but the house will seem so empty when he leaves. i know our family can be considered a little large in today's society (nuclear family: 6 pple), but all the same, he will be missed. it feels so empty when one member of my family's gone.

anyway (sorry emay, gonna borrow your idea\template once again), i thank God for:
1. letting me plan my timetable such that i've fridays off once again. such a coincidence that my dad's leaving on friday and i've friday off, so i can go send him off! coincidence? i think not! thank you, Lord!
2. good friends who encourage and comfort me when i feel utterly alone in this world packed full with pple (you know who you are). esp those who've taken my hand and walked with me thru my latest period of depression. i am truly thankful.
3. giving me the honour of letting me write yet another song (see previous post) when i was feeling emotionally down.
4. my black beauty - my one and only - my darling piano. sorry i havent gotten down to polishing you just yet again. i promise i'll do it soon.
5. my good enough grades. though my gpa missed an A by 0.1, i am thankful.

til another time, sizzlers!

i remain your thankful & amazed servant, Lord,

me

here's a song that i wrote recently. it aint nuthin' too grand, misters, but it expresses what meh heart strings'r twangin' deep inside'r meh.

enjoy, God, this one's for u.

I want to give You me

I step through the gates of Your courtyard
Holding nothing in my hands
I want so much to give You something
Something worthy of You, Lord
But i find nothing
Nothing worthy
None compares to Your gifts to me
So I...

(Chorus) I want to give You me
Take everything You see
I offer You my all
My flesh, my heart, my soul
I will do my best
Lay at Your feet my cares
I'm ready
Take me I'm ready
To do Your will

I draw back the curtains of Your tabernacle
Feel the peace of Your presence
I remember Your promises
Tears creep into my eyes
You are with me
Every moment
Never leaving my side
So I...

(Chorus)

I enter Your Holy of Holies
And kneel by the ark of Your covenant
I hear Your voice whispering softly
Softly into my ear
I'm forgiven
Sins atoned for
The way is open through Jesus Christ
So I...

(Chorus)

(Bridge) So much You have given me
So much You love me
So much I want to give You back
Measure for measure but I can't
So I give You..

(Chorus)

wel, it's the second day of the new year. i'm a lil sad that the past year's gone. but at least it went out with a bit of a happy note. two thgs to clear up b4 we move on to resolutions (which dont really work, but heck, it makes u excited and it makes u hopeful. both of which are rather nice to have at the beginning. that way, even if u start to go downhill emotionally, it's quite a high platform to start off with so the drop wont be that disastrous. presumably.)

things to clear.

one. i said during sunday class that one thg that changed my life in 06 was the christmas children's drama i ic-ed. i said twice that i would not do it again. that is so wrong and i apologise. sorry uncle Joshua (saw that kinda shocked look on your face). smthg's been hogging my brainspace and i cant think clearly. i wasnt ready and honestly, if it werent so strange, i wlda fell aslp then and there on the table in ACJC. what i said was that i would not want to do that again. what i meant was that i would not want to do that again that way. i would want more time to practice and (if possible) more cooperative and less exasperating kids. i would want more time to hone leading skills (i know i have little. i quake at the thought of leading a bunch of pple i dont even know by name nor by face). i admit that perhaps if i were stricter on them, or appear more authoratative, they may listen. or mebe i gotta learn how to show pple that i'm upset because right now, not even my siblings know when i'm upset.

two. i'm sorry to everyone whom i've offended in 06. if i am to list out everything i did wrong and everyone i've wronged, this post would be at least 58% longer than it is now. but this doesnt mean that i'm insincere in my apology. i am really sorry to all, and i can only hope for your forgiveness. i hope we can start this new year a fresh and i pray that i will not repeat that same offense once more.

resolutions.

one. to be bolder. i dont even dare to ask for smthg frm my parents let alone lead a bunch of pple in bible study.

two. to be more thoughtful of others. i've been doing quite a bit of thinking lately (hence my silence for about the past 5 days) and i've come to the not-so-nice-to-know conclusion that i'm one real selfish thg. not gonna say here how i reached that conclusion, tho. it's gonna be difficult to stop thinking abt myself and to focus more on others. especially when others hurt me and dont even know it. plus i've not the guts to tell them i'm hurting. so that kinda makes matters worse. but i'm gonna try my best.

three. to know God better. i've recently been given a beautiful new bible. it's got a thick leathery green strip on the top, a thinner strip of white with flower shapes (sorta) cut out, and the other 1/2 of the bible's purple with sparkles. it's light and small. i've taken to reading James (because of GoFish, i've never read James as a whole before, this outta be interesting) and 1 Corinthians all over again.

four. to write more songs for God. i find that i really love composing songs for God. so far, i written a few, left some unfinished, thinking of passing them to Gloria (mummy's pestering me to hand them in and share them and not waste them. i dont think if i keep them to myself i'd be wasting them, tho. it wld probably qualify as another reason to say that i'm selfish). i just finished one. it'd sound good on a guitar, tho, not on a piano. songs are powerful stuff. they help me remember who matters most here: not me, but the Almighty. they help me shift the focus from me to the Soverign One. they help me see from His point of view.

five. pray more. prayer helps tune me into God's frequency, and less of the world's. i get distracted real easily, so this ought to help. plus, the less i talk with God, the further i drift from Him. common sense, huh.

six. be more diligent in my school work. (note to self: start revision early - when the chapter's done. organise notes ASAP. dont simply file them away in hopes that i'll have time to re-read them.)

seven. be quick to listen and slow to anger.

eight. learn when to be depressed and when to let my thoughts have free rein. according to sunand, the more i think, the more depressed i become, the more anti-social i become. either that really is true or i listen to what others say about me, decide that i like what i'm hearing and then act out the part. brains are powerful. they can erect towers and build worlds and lie to the body they head. make believe. something i'm really really good at. so, pretend what he says is really true. in that case, either i got to learn not to think so much, or learn to be less depressed. perhaps i should learn when to be depressed and when to let my thoughts roam free.

nine. learn to release anger and irritation and all feelings negative that have been accumulating in a bottle inside of me slowly and not so destructively. i have a tendency to bottle things up and only allow a tinge of my feelings to show, expecting others to get the hint, connect the dots and understand. apparently, not everyone's psychic, not everyone's as sensitive as i'd imagine. but that's ok. i'm not that sensitive either. i've tried not bottle-ing up feelings. didnt work. how do you not bottle it up? i dont geddit. so instead of attempting to show my feelings as and when they pop up, i've decided to find smthg, what they call an avenue, to release bottled-up stuff. mebe i'l start playing with my barbie again.

guess all these are simply ways and means for me to reach my goal. goal is pretty simple. to be the person God wants me to be. pretty sure that includes fearing and loving God. which would then include loving humans. the first one aint too difficult: our God who can simply blink and we're goners, but doesnt do that. instead, He chooses to love us, save us and grow us. what's there not to love about God? second one's trickier: what's there to love about humans? heck, what's there to love about myself? a horrid calculative creature who thinks primarily about itself. seeking to satisfy its needs, seeking personal happiness, seeking personal survival. i didnt see myself as one worth loving, until that vision from God during YMLC. then i understood. answer was right there all along, but somehow, i've overlooked it. if we'd only see thgs the way God sees them. gosh, what a world we would be living in.

anyway, that's my resolutions for this year. hopefully, with God's help, i can get somewhere. even achieving and sustaining one of the nine is good enough. pretty optimistic that i can nail at least one =]

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And in whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him."

~Colossians 3:15-17

may you have a gOd bLEsSeD new year

(btw, pix frm the Christmas Carnival are out. the pix taken with weichen's cam, i mean : http://orangeturvy.shutterfly.com/action/?a=8AcOGTFq1ZN2FS&notag=1)

me

I was just wondering, is there such a thing as you know something is wrong but u cant quite put your finger on it. No matter how much u prod and poke arnd inside your own brain and heart, u can’t find the root problem. Is there such a thing? Perhaps then we aren’t searching deep enough or we are too blind to see or we don’t want to see the truth because we know we won’t like it. Hmmm.

Anyway, I did Daniel Ng’s study on James 1:2-12 with God and I think it’s a really good one. At the end, I still see the problems in my life, I foresee more problems to come, and I know I will struggle. But I am comforted to know that God is with me. I don’t know how I’m going to react when I actually face the future problems, I cannot predict that well, but at least now, I know where exactly in the bible I can find help and encouragement and comfort =]

Here’s a really short summary which does Daniel Ng’s study no justice, but it’s a sort-of teaser =P :

1. KNOW that troubles are inevitable and purposeful (v2-4)
Both James and Paul (Ro 5:3-5) say we should adopt an attitude of pure joy because we know that troubles are inevitable (just because we are Christians doesn’t mean we have a lifetime of bliss: we suffer just like everyone else) and purposeful (pain is an extremely effective teacher to grow us. It engraves on our hearts and etches on our minds what God wants to impress on our life - so that we will never forget).
We need to see our troubles from God's perspective. Knowing that troubles and trials have a purpose we need to cultivate certain attitudes.

2. Cultivate an attitude of JOY (v2)
Joy is the deep contentment and peace that comes from knowing God is in control of every area of our lives.
And because we trust that God is always in control we can believe that whatever hurts, pain, struggles and crises in our lives are being used to help us grow. We can have an attitude of peace and contentment because we know that when He has tested us we shall come forth as gold - pure gold.
But sometimes, it is difficult to see the purpose of our troubles. Then, we need to cultivate another attribute.
3. Cultivate a heart of WISDOM (v5)
The mature person is a wise person. A wise person is a person who asks God and depends on Him. And wisdom is what God will provide.
Wisdom is the skill of living successfully in the midst of pressures and pain. It is the truth acted upon that results in godly behaviour in the midst of pressurizing and trying times.
It is in trying times that we need wisdom to make decisions. It is in emotionally confusing times that we need wisdom from God.
And we have a generous God. He longs to gives us the skill and power to make difficult choices in difficult circumstances. James says just simply ask in faith.

4. Cultivate an attitude of SUBMISSION (v6-8)
When we ask God for wisdom to make the right choices or decisions in difficult circumstances; are we willing to follow through when He reveals His will? Faith here means coming to God and say: "Thy will be done".
Faith here means to trust God without reservations – that His will is perfect and good for us.
5. Cultivate a clear perspective – an ETERNAL one (v9-11)
We live in a world that places a lot of emphasis on material possessions and paper qualifications. That preaches happiness resides in how much tangible stuff you own. But James tells us in verses 9 to 11 that these things do not last. When God turns up the heat everything will be destroyed and fade away.
Maturity enables us to focus on the long term. Pain and suffering enable us to see how transient or temporal this world is. Spiritual maturity and wisdom comes through trials and enables us to focus on the unseen and the eternal.
“For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far out weighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporal but what is unseen is eternal.” (2 Cor.4:17-18)

6. The REWARD \ RESULT of enduring trials (v12)

This is the joy or the true happiness that comes because we have been approved of God. He has tested us and we have been found faithful.

When you wake up in the morning; take a good long look into the mirror: are you happy with the kind of person you are? Are you maturing and growing into the person God wants you to be?

Truly happy and joyful is the man or woman who can say an affirmative YES!!

btw,
HAPPY NEW YEAR~!! =D

gOd bLEsS

me